Tend To Your Garden

Maybe it's because I'm naturally introverted, or perhaps there's a strange tendency for me to over-analyze all that I do, but I generally take responsibility for the way that I feel. I believe very strongly that we each have an opportunity, in every moment, to shift our lives to where we want them to be. We cannot blame others for our mental space. A large part of that is managing perspective, or, as a dear friend of mine likes to say, to tend to our garden. 

The garden that lives in your mind is entirely your responsibility. Every daisy, wildflower, weed grows there because you allow it to. You can take time to water the seeds you're excited for, remove weeds that are getting in the way, or simply assess where your garden is compared to where you'd like it to be. 

In interactions with others, we are often offered a lot of seeds, seeds that we can water or choose to leave alone. Some of these seeds include gossip about others, attitudes about a situation, or a kind compliment about your own self. Which seeds will be beneficial to the garden? Once mindfulness is brought to this practice, it's easy to determine which seeds we would like to water and which might harm the growth of our already blooming plants. 

In the self-talk we have in our heads, we often ignore the weeds that wrap around the bottom of other plants, sucking the life and energy from them. These are the self-harming habits we carry around, whether it be a habit of perfectionism, constant worrying, or bad thoughts and feelings about ourselves. Removing weeds can be a tedious process, and most of the time, the weeds come back, sometimes rather quickly. We must be steadfast in our work of removing these weeds, and know that every moment we can catch ourselves playing out a negative mental habit, gets us one step closer to the beautiful, thriving garden we dream of. 

I like the garden analogy so much because it's organic, moving, always changing... just like our minds. It's easy to think, "Oh, look! I've pulled the weed! I've succeeded. Never again will I have to deal with that." But you know, and I know, that habits aren't only difficult to change... they come back over and over again, each time in a slightly different form - hopefully in a less threatening form - but always back again, challenging us again. 

When we view our mental health like a garden that must be frequently tended to, checked up on, we set more realistic expectations for how change will come about. It's a long, slow process. It takes more than a few seasons of life for a well-seasoned garden to run smoothly. Even then, there's room for change! For surprise! Don't get too discouraged if all of the sudden you have a huge, looming thistle hanging about in what you thought was your perfect garden. Know that you have the tools to overcome even the thickest of weeds. 

You got this. 

So much love, 

Brooke

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